Modern Family

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I looked to my right. His fingers were speedy, pressing some virtual buttons on the ever so smart invention, ipad. He has been locked to the same position for the past 2 hours. The only time he leaves the bed is for the rest room or when his stomach rebels in hunger.

There I was judging my husband, who I love ever so dearly, while checking out pinterest from my new iphone 6 glued to my hands. I decided to be slightly cheeky and texted him (who was still staring intensely on the ipad): ‘Miss me much?’ He attended to the sound of his buzzing iphone 6 and silently read my text.

He turned to me, kissed my hand, gave me a grin and returned to his thousands of soldiers whom he needed to feed with bread before he prep them for the next bloody war. It appear to me that he somehow enjoyed being a King (who doesn’t) much more than a plain boring doctor.  He checked his rank every so often and thoroughly proud of himself for being the top 13.

I shooked my head, in frustration. To make myself better I reached for the Facebook icon and glanced through it to see if anything could shift my mood. If words could kill, I’m probably dead by now. Not for the first or second time. For everytime-th that I opened my facebook. That being said, I killed many with my words too. No shame. Just ‘key-board warriors’ doing their thang.

After that I updated the grocery shopping via the couple app. Hoping that my husband will read it on time before his next visit to the shop and I could make my Lamb Biryani without missing an ingredient. If I do, he will then suffers great consequences -no ipad for a day. Which means, his soldiers will be left unfed. And down the ranking he goes. No messin’ with the queen of households *flipped hairs

I quickly moved on to Wechat to show off to my sister my new Coach purse I bought for myself. I also had a lengthy chat with my sis-in-law who is moving to a new home and decided to create an English inspired living room. During the chat, I browsed Pinterest to see if there is anything ‘English’ that she could get to help with the transition. Upon finishing the chat, I suddenly remembered that my husband and I will be having our break in February. So I logged in to Skyscanner and Winter holiday on the cruise will be great too, so I thought. And on Safari I went -for hours.

I hoped that the cruise will bring me back to reality, but no it didn’t. My unattended husband went to the kichen twice to fill himself with random munchies. I felt remorsed and ashamed. I felt disgusted with myself and to a certain extent, resented him. How could we allow such lifeless technology to devour our  marriage? How could we replace on old school warm conversation with typed text on a touch screen to relay our thoughts and emotions? Since when does the commitment to our happily-ever-after become so cheap and so ‘convenient’?

I reflected hard on myself. On us.

So I browsed the so-called inspiring quotes and ‘liked’ it on my wall. I re-pinned the quotations from the bible and that’s my prayer done for the day. Me who needed interventions and rehab from this blamed technology turned to the very same enemy to mend my broken promises. Because. It’s convenient. It’s fast. It’s easy. Because in today’s world. It’s acceptable. It’s okay. It’s the freedom of everything.

I sat my husband down. Well, the best I could while he’s cozying up with the ipad. I said ‘We need to talk’. He gave me the look as if he knew -I’m going to talk about his precious soldiers. He has his armour of defense ready. My facebook, pinterest, k-drama are all on the first line. I said I acknowledged that. That’s why we needed to change. First, he needs to accept it and only then we could move together. As a team. He put the ipad away. And said ‘I’m ready’.

Our first conversation was awkward. As if we are going on a date for the first time. I said ‘So what’s on the news?’ He blurted out about two missing teenagers in America. I continued to ask questions like a reporter and he will deliver the answer -short and sweet. I felt annoyed and demanded he asks me questions instead. And he repeated all my questions and hoped that he will get away with it. And grinned. And requested for a massage. My face has Cinderella’s step-mother written all over who’s about to force him into a poisonous apple. But he still deemed it funny. Maybe he would get it if it’s an emoticon *sigh..

I set a rule where we should put verbal communication first, above all. Above all social media platform. He nodded. We have to attend our daily chat first before attending our gadgets. He nodded. It’s only an hour a day that we could feed the soldiers, running restaurant, farming and chasing minions. He nodded.

It’s not the modern days to be blamed. It’s not the technology, gadgets or apps. It’s just us, humans. Who make mistakes and make wrong choices. Who quickly settled for ‘convenience’. Who surrender to the virtual world to make us complete. Who thinks being acceptable in social media makes you more of a human than just being yourself. Who are comforted by the tag #key-boardwarriors when in fact we’re such sore losers. When the world need clean water and food -you think you changed the world by talking about religions. When a 14 year old girl forced to sell her body to set her free from poverty -you judged her.

Shame on me. On you. On us.

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